There’s probably a better way

I woke up this morning to the smell of rain in the air and a trail of muddy footprints from the doggy door in the kitchen throughout the entire house.  It was like those dotted-line trails in the old Family Circus comic.  Thank goodness for our fake-wood flooring.  So, my morning started off with me trying to hold the dog down to wipe her feet, which was the Best Game Ever.  And then I cemented my start to the day doing the one-footed wet-wipe scootch dance move all over the house.  It’s a stomp to the wipe, and a push-drag motion, sometimes with a twist.

I got through the first room with that action, but then decided to switch it up, and put a wipe under the ball of each foot, and did the twist.  Not very efficient, but hilarious.  This, unfortunately, excited the dog, who decided to do a lap through the yard and come back in again, freshly muddied feet at the ready.

I took her down, calf-roping style, wiped her feet, closed the stupid doggy door and got back to the push-drag method.  There’s really no point to this, except now my calves feel like I did a workout.


Night is the time for bed.

Daylight Savings has done a number on me this year.  Maybe it does it every year, but for some reason, by 5:30pm, the sky is dark and I am ready for bed.  I don’t remember how long it takes to shake it off and get used to the darker evenings, but this year, the transition seems particularly rough.

I remember when I was the age of my own kids, my parents were regularly up, watching TV, doing chores, folding laundry, paying bills late into the night.  They went to bed at 10 or 11 every night and got up and out to work the next day as we were leaving for school.  No, for reals, they actually stayed awake and watched TV.  I cannot even make it through a single show on my DVR without pining for my bed, and if I lay down to watch a show, forget about it.  I’m out cold.  I mean, granted, I am also totally not motivated to do chores and fold laundry at night, and I’m sure my parents weren’t either, but they did it because it had to be done.  Not because they were thrilled to be awake.  Although, maybe they were thrilled?  Who knows, parents, ugh.

I think this means my sleep apnea (oh yeah, sexy Darth Vader) is not well controlled right now, because I’ve been more restless every night, and more out of it during the day, even though I’m doing my best to spend at least 8 hours in bed. I’m going to go check in with the sleep clinic, and see if having more air blown up my nose or whatever is what needs to happen.  My life is glamorous, and my kids are going to be THRILLED that I’m sharing this level of detail with the world someday.  It’s called Keeping It Real, kids.