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« Borrowing Trouble | Main | Knock, knock... »

Scissors and Paperclips

Speaking of my mom: One of her unique talents is the art of the mixed metaphor.
She manages to get her meaning across, and sometimes the resulting phrase is
hilarious. "You've buttered your bread, so go lie in it." She's also big on
settling scores. When I was about 8 years old, she snarled "I hope you have
three children exactly like yourself." Funny how things work out. If I had
three like me, we'd all be sleeping in until 10 am. Nope, I got one kid exactly
like my Mom. Some sort of karmic twist, I'd say. My oldest has inherited her
Grandma's flair with mixed metaphors. She also has an unnatural level of
intuition that freaks us all out a bit. She looks like my husband, but when she
plants her hand on her hip and gives me the business, it's all Grandma. My
favorite mix-up is still happening. If her legs fall asleep, she calls it
"scissors and paperclips" instead of the more traditional "pins and needles." I
corrected her a few times, but it appears that any office products will do.
Staples and binder clips, anyone? After a few attempts to fix her, I just
decided that it was her way, and its okay with me.